S.O.B.
2/15/2023
***Disclaimer: This story was inspired by a prompt provided by Reedsy.com. Prompt is provided below. Visit their site https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/ to learn more.***
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Prompt: Two super competitive colleagues meet at the office’s monthly BINGO night
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Tonight was the night. Friday the thirty-first to be exact. Linda had been waiting for her chance to emerge victorious from the war against her coworkers, better known as monthly BINGO night. Not only because of the cash prize, but also, and more importantly, because this was her chance to beat Karen’s stupid face and knock her off her three-time-back-to-back-winning-streak throne once and for all.
Ever since Karen came into the office three months ago, it was like Linda didn’t exist. Everyone loved her and her seemingly sweet charm, and before she knew it, Linda was old news. Karen became the queen of the HR department and nothing was ever the same. To make matters worse, she had de-throned Linda at her game. And that’s when Karen really became Linda’s nemesis. From then on, a typical day consisted of passive aggressive, fake-friendly exchanges between Linda and Karen, the two competitive old office biddies, and the pressure was always on to one up each other. And to top it all off, Karen was a born natural at BINGO, the reigning champ for three consecutive BINGO nights. But tonight that was all going to change. Linda had been training intensely, waiting for her moment to take back the crown once again. And Linda just knew her patience would be rewarded. Karen was finally going to be outmatched.
Putting her game face on, Linda high-tailed it to the office at a whopping forty miles per hour, arriving fifteen minutes early - as always - so she could gather her thoughts and give herself the usual pep talk.
“This is it. Tonight’s the night you take that phony Karen out. You’ll have your office cred back and you’ll be on top again. She’ll have to respect you then.”
Linda pulled her BINGO dabber out of her purse. It was passed down to her by her mother, an avid BINGO player when she worked at the same company years before Linda was even born. In fact, her mother was the reigning BINGO champion of the office during her time, which is also why it was so important for Linda to redeem her title, for the sake of her mother’s legacy as well as her own. Her mother told her there would always be a Karen to throw a wrench in your plans, but that couldn’t stop you from taking back what’s yours. Gilded bedazzled dabber in hand, Linda made her way into the office.
—
It was just another day for Karen as she prepared to get her fourth win at the company’s monthly BINGO night tonight. She wasn’t nervous at all; she knew that she would emerge victorious, and the cash prize wouldn’t be so bad either.
Everyone at the office welcomed Karen with open arms when she started her new job a few months ago. Except for one person. An old grouchy HR rep named Linda. Ironically enough, her job was to resolve workplace issues and disputes, but it seemed that the second Karen walked in the door that Linda’s professional skills went out the window. She clearly had an issue with her, and Karen wasn’t sure what she did to earn the cold shoulder from Linda right out of the gate.
Well, it wasn’t necessarily right out of the gate. Linda was polite enough - though distant - when she introduced herself initially, but after about a month of working in the HR department, Karen felt a shift in the air around them, and it seemed as if the atmosphere was a lot more hostile between the two old biddies. It was after Karen’s first victory at the company BINGO night that any chances of them ever becoming anything but enemies were crushed.
The rest of Karen’s coworkers flocked to her after her first win against Linda, and they seemed to be rooting for her. It’s not like it was Karen’s fault that she just so happened to be a natural at BINGO and that everyone just so happened to like her. Linda was just a sore loser, a bad sport in Karen’s opinion. Linda knew that she finally met her match and she just couldn’t stand it. Karen found herself enjoying the view from atop her BINGO throne, where the entire office ate out of the palm of her hand. Saren knew that this would be the start of a rivalry for the ages.
Karen headed to the office, twenty minutes early so she could get a good seat for BINGO. She was calm and collected; she didn’t need a pep talk before she went inside. Karen smiled to herself as she sauntered into the building.
“This will be a piece of cake,” she mumbled to herself as she took her seat and got her BINGO dabber ready.
—
“Linda! Over here!” It was Karen. There was a vacant seat to her left, and she was waving Linda over to sit next to her.
“Keep your enemies closer,” Linda muttered to herself as she put on her best fake smile and made her way over to where Karen was sitting. They made small fake pleasantries as the rest of their coworkers filed in and took their seats.
Karen’s BINGO dabber sparkled in the fluorescent light. It was glittery pink, with her name printed on the side. Linda had to admit, it was impressive. She had never seen anything like it. It seemed like Karen took BINGO as seriously as she did, seeing as she took the extra time and care to personalize her dabber as well. Linda’s gaze lingered on the impressive dabber a moment longer before she snapped back to reality. It was clear that Karen wasn’t playing around.
“Nice dabber,” Linda said cooly, attempting to mask her interest. “My mother gave me mine.” She twirled her dabber between her fingers, displaying it proudly.
“Very lovely,” Karen replied, her voice dripping with false appreciation, much like a parent when they are doting on their toddler’s handprint artwork. “Well, may the best biddy win,” She said to Linda cheerfully, chuckling as the BINGO caller asked for everyone’s attention.
“I second that,” Linda practically growled, eyes focused on the front of the room, not giving Karen so much as another glance. She had to focus.
While the BINGO caller rambled on about the cash prize, Linda’s mind was set on one thing only. Murdering Karen. At BINGO of course. The BINGO caller reminded the players to mark their FREE SPACE on their cards, and Linda laughed to herself. She had marked hers as soon as she sat down. What is this, amateur hour? She thought to herself, amused, as the BINGO caller announced that the game was underway.
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“Linda! Over here!” Karen called Linda over to the vacant seat next to her as she saw her walk into the office.
“Kill ‘em with kindness,” Karen muttered to herself as Linda approached cautiously. It was evident that the plastered smile Linda was wearing was forced. She hoped that this act of “kindness” would throw Linda off her game. Not that she was too worried about being outdone by the old maid, but she decided that you can’t be too careful when your office cred was at stake. Karen was born ready.
After the fake pleasantries were out of the way, Karen settled into her seat, readying her BINGO dabber in her right hand. She stole a glance at Linda’s dabber. It was black, adorned with elegant black swirls. It looked like a very important family heirloom, an ancient relic of significant importance. It was clear that Linda came prepared to win.
“Well, may the best biddy win,” Karen said to Linda cheerfully, chuckling as the BINGO caller asked for everyone’s attention.
Linda muttered a half-hearted response as she turned to face the front of the room. It was amusing to Karen how seriously she was taking the game. It will be her downfall, Karen thought to herself as the game began. She knew that taking BINGO too seriously was a losing strategy. Unfortunately, what she didn’t know at that moment was that being too careless would be her downfall.
—
“B-6. O-73. I-36.”
The BINGO caller yelled out letters and numbers left and right, in a wild frenzy as the excitement in the air grew.
“Oh shoot,” Karen cursed as she shook her dabber vigorously. It appeared as if she was out of ink. She looked at Linda as she said, “Good thing I brought a spare,” winking as she turned her head and leaned down to dig through her big satchel of a purse. As Linda watched her dig through her bag, something occurred to her. With a smile, she waited for Karen to resurface before she spoke.
“Be careful…”
What Linda said next was drowned out by the BINGO caller’s booming voice as he continued to call out letters and numbers at a rapid rate of speed.
This went on for a while without any winners until Linda had three different ways to BINGO. Her heart rate increased. Any moment now the caller would call out the magic number, the winning number. She just knew it.
“N-34.”
Linda was so sure her winning number was going to be announced. But what she heard instead made her blood run cold. It wasn’t her winning number.
“BINGO!”
Linda’s heart felt like it stopped beating in her chest as she realized she had lost, despite her seemingly foolproof plan. What was worse than losing was realizing that the winner just happened to be sitting right next to Linda. She couldn’t believe her eyes as she saw Karen making her way up to the front of the room to get her BINGO card checked by the caller. At that moment, Linda’s blood began to boil.
This cannot be happening, Linda scowled internally as her once confident smile turned into an ugly teeth grinding grimace. This was supposed to be the night that she came out on top once again. Her plan had failed.
As Linda stewed in her disbelief, she heard something she didn’t expect to hear. The caller told Karen that she didn’t have the right numbers. She missed one, slipped up by mistake. Linda smiled as Karen realized her defeat. As she came to sit back down, Linda turned to her, addressing Karen with the most over-the-top, fake friendly flair she could muster, smiling all the while.
“Aww, what a shame. It happens to the best of us. I mean, beginner’s luck has to run out sometime right?” Linda let out a short haughty laugh before adding, “Better luck next time.” She gave Karen a cold smile as she turned her eyes back to the BINGO caller. Linda had to win. This meant everything to her.
“O-15. I-23. G-40.”
Linda was losing hope when, a few numbers later, the BINGO caller called out her number. The winning number. She couldn’t believe it - or at least she couldn’t believe that she got away with her diabolical plan. She put on a show of mock surprise as she yelled, “BINGO!” so loud that it rattled the ceiling tiles, practically skipping up to the front to get her numbers checked by the caller.
“And it looks like we have a winner!” the BINGO caller exclaimed.
Nothing else mattered in this moment but her victory, and most importantly, Karen’s defeat. Linda didn’t care what it took; this is what she came to do, even if she had to play dirty to get there. After three months of humiliation, Linda had reclaimed the BINGO crown and the HR throne. She was queen of her department once again. Not to mention she got some sweet cash out of the deal.
As Linda sauntered back over to get her purse as everyone prepared to leave, Karen caught her arm and said, “Well played, Linda,” and gave her the most transparent bitter smile that Linda had ever seen.
She replied with a mischievous smirk and replied, “Thanks. And to think you were so close. Well, maybe next time. I mean I did tell you to be careful.” With that, Linda winked a wicked wink and sashayed out of the office, head held high with snooty pride.
—
The way Linda said “And to think you were so close.” That’s all Karen could think about on the drive home. That, and the way Linda was obviously smug about something. Karen never missed a beat; for three months she had been at the top of her game. How could she have slipped now? She didn’t remember hearing a wrong number and mismarking her BINGO card. It was a rookie mistake. Karen recalled the way Linda tried to belittle her and call her an amateur. She laughed to herself at the notion. This wasn’t Karen’s first rodeo, and that’s why something just didn’t seem to be adding up.
Then it hit her, in the driveway in front of her house. Linda also told her to be careful, after she had leaned down to grab another BINGO dabber from her purse mid-game. She only took her eyes off Linda for a split second…
“Impossible. I would’ve known,” Karen said to herself, doubtful as she furrowed her brow and tried to fit the pieces together in her muddled brain. Karen couldn’t stop thinking about how mischievous and smug Linda looked, as if she knew something that no one else did. As if maybe she had just gotten away with a diabolical plan. When the reality of what happened finally hit her, Karen was raging mad. She slammed her fists against the steering wheel of the car.
“That no good, lying son of a –!”
—
As Linda settled into bed after a hard-won victory, she laughed to herself. She had done it. She had finally won.
I said I would do whatever it takes, Linda thought to herself as she smiled, replaying the events of the evening in her head. She knew her window of opportunity when she saw it, when Karen bent down to retrieve her second BINGO dabber.
When Karen sat back upright, Linda leaned in, joking in a lighthearted and playful tone, “Be careful, anyone could have reached over and dabbed your BINGO card when you weren’t looking.” Linda elbowed Karen in the arm jokingly and Karen laughed. She never suspected a thing. All it took was letting her guard down for a single moment.
As if Karen really thought the two old biddies could actually be friends. Linda scoffed at the notion. It was no matter what she thought now, for now Linda was the one laughing. She turned out the lights, pulling the covers up and resting her hands on her chest as she stared up at the ceiling.
Chuckling to herself in the darkness, she said aloud, “That old, gullible, son of a –!”
THE END