03/15/2025: Mental Spring Cleaning

This week I decided that it’s time to reevaluate, for real this time. The world is too loud and I’ve been too distracted by all the wrong things. It’s time for my Mental Spring Cleaning. 

Not only have I not been savoring things like I used to, but everything is starting to feel like more of a chore than a creative privilege. I’m in desperate need of a reset, of a return to the days of endless inspiration and that feeling of excited accomplishment. So I’m going to take the rest of this month to step back and reflect on everything I’ve done to get where I am right now instead of dwelling on what I haven’t done. 

In order to do this, I need to revisit my old work, and I need to take time to reminisce on the wins instead of the disappointment and the losses. I’m going to go back to watching, reading and listening to inspiring things that restore and rejuvenate my wellbeing instead of jeopardizing it. I’m going to shut out that racket from the social media world, where I just realized recently that it’s just a place for an audience, not for a real community. I will retreat back into myself, take a hard look at what’s not working for me, and figure out once and for all how to get back to some semblance of how things were before. 

I’ve learned that self care is often the miniscule things we take for granted. It could be as simple as a silent moment, a favorite song, a beautiful day, a great movie, a laugh or a kind word with a loved one, as small as changing out of your PJs when you’d rather do just about anything else. But self care can also be a drastic change to life as we know it, as we learn to start living for ourselves and leave the life and the self that we once knew behind for a healthier and more promising perspective. 

I myself have been trying to be more in tune with the little things that make up the whole, and trying to recenter myself in an unbalanced world. This is one of the hardest times I’ve had since embarking on my journey years ago, and I know it’s just time to be honest with myself about how low I’ve been feeling, and it’s time to pick myself back up and figure out how to get back to work. Because I know I still love it, and I don’t want to lose it again. 

I know I can do it, despite the very persuasive voices in my head that think otherwise right now. I just have to remember that whether it’s in regards to the world and the people outside or my own negative inner narrative, that feelings are not facts; I can do anything I set out to do. I can broaden my horizons intellectually and practice external and inner kindness and empathy. I can wallow for a reasonable amount of time, but more importantly, I can keep going instead of giving up once my bout of doubt and sadness is over. 

And I know right now it’s time to get right again, for the sake of my sanity, my happiness, and most of all my soul.