08/31/2023: Less is So Much More

Things are going well, but I have lingering anxieties and a lack of motivation some days. I’m anxious for upcoming events that I dread and it’s been hard to put my heart into every aspect of my day for some unknown reason. I think knowing how busy and hectic life will be for the rest of the year as we approach the holidays is getting me in a funk, and making me want to get away again. 

I’m looking forward to escaping to nature at the end of the year for a chance to celebrate my achievements this year and to see what the cabins feel like in the winter months. It would be a first for us to go during that time of year and I’m strangely excited that the experience will be new. 

I have daydreams of cozying up in the warm little cabin with my love and drinking warm drinks and laughing and talking about how far we’ve come and what our dreams for next year will be. Things only seem to get better the longer we’re together, and it makes me eager to see what the following year brings. I believe we will continue to find our way and things will be brighter on all counts. 

I think about the people in my life who either aren’t or will not be lucky enough to achieve self love and self actualization and I truly do feel for them, and not in a pretentious way. If what I’ve learned and how I feel could be shared with others who needed help, I would gladly share it to make the world a better place for more people. But unfortunately all I can do is work on myself and hope that the rest of the world finds their own way on their own. 

My life is so much more rich now than it has ever been, and I have my clear and peaceful mind to thank for that. Less is so much more for me now, and this encompasses every aspect of my life. Quality is more important than quantity in relationships and experiences, and I just feel more myself than I ever have. Change has been good to me, at least I believe so. 

I’m no longer afraid to grow, to find the path that is right for me, and I no longer care if the world has something to say about what I’m doing and what I’m contributing to society. I know my own heart and intentions and finally that’s all that matters. Finally that’s enough. 

I think back to the person I was a year ago, the state of mind I was in as I started to write in this very journal. Something that I thought would surely break me ended up being for the better, and I have stronger friendships and understanding of myself because of it. 

I’m another year older, and I definitely feel wiser. It’s amazing how resilient humans are, and how much potential they have to mold themselves into a better human being. One can only hope that they have the strength and resolve to take life’s punches and come out on top, and to find out who they really are.