10/04/2023: I’m a Realist
I’m feeling good today. It’s just one of those feelings you can’t describe; it’s just a state of being. I don’t have any pressing matters or worries, at least in the current moment, so I’m trying to enjoy it while it lasts.
I keep thinking of a quote I learned recently and about how it applies to me: “The pessimist complains about the wind, the optimist expects it to change, the realist adjusts the sails.”
This quote encompasses my life’s journey so far. The naïve and bitter pessimist I once was sat and wallowed, told myself things would come to me or just change on their own. It was easy to believe that things were impossible, out of reach. It was easier to complain and long for things without the willingness to try to make my dreams and desires a reality.
As I moved on from that season of my life, I moved onto a happier place, but the shadows that still lingered were quite dark, and still, more often than not, too close for comfort. It wasn’t difficult to slip back into that pessimistic mindset I worked so hard to escape. I would constantly try, not trying my best, and wallow when I failed, finding anything or anyone I could blame for giving up an infinite number of times. When things went right I would flourish, but the moment things went awry or didn’t work out the way I initially expected, everything would fall apart once again. In this season of my life, I still expected things to happen to me or come to me while I passively waited with a slight increase in hope and enthusiasm. This was the season of my life in which things eventually started to improve, when I realized what the missing piece was.
When the word “realist” hits the ear, it’s easy to give it a negative, or not-so-optimistic, connotation. A realist is a person that expects nothing and does not despair or worry. One might argue that they are indifferent. But upon contemplation of that word, I see now that a realist is content with their place in the universe, their lot in life, and they have simultaneously tried, failed, been let down, been lifted up, and at the end of the day they still know who they are and they are at peace with what the next day will bring. A realist is merely a person who actively tries, learns from their failures as well as their success, and knows that life will forever ebb and flow with and against their will as they navigate the waters of life.
It is eye opening to realize that all the good and bad times define you, and they will only make or break you if you let them. I am finally at peace knowing that if I fall down I will just get back up and try again; I don’t have to start over or expect consistent failure. I am finally at peace also knowing that if I want something, I can go get it; I don’t have to sit around like an optimist and eagerly wait for happiness or success to come to me. I am finally a realist.